1/30/09

How do you know when it's time for a baby?

This last week one of my co-workers told me she was expecting twins! I was so excited for her but also felt my heart sink. Why does it seem I am the only 26 year old married person I know without any children? Babies seem to be everywhere. It's not only that we do not have children but that it will most likely be some time before we do. I'm glad that we are waiting until we are really ready, prepared, and secure. I know I will appreciate the wait when I am able to work part-time or stay at home with our kids.

To ward off my baby hungry moments I keep a little notebook by my bed at home and at work. I put little notes and ideas about crafts, games, education, advice to myself, anything I think of dealing with motherhood. One day it may be a good resource for me, but for now, it helps me feel like I am at least preparing in some way. It is dawning on me, a little late I know, that families do not just happen. I must take ACTION and work towards it everyday. Action may very well be my favorite word of the moment, or mantra for the year.

As much as I want to be a mother and look forward to it with great anticipation, I also have this other side of me that is terrified by the whole process. First off, being pregnant does not seem like fun. It seems so alien to have an actual human in your stomach. Ick! I know it is suppose to be beautiful but I think it is weird. Second, having a child is such a huge responsibility. I can not even imagine how much parents must have to give of themselves.

So how will we know when it's the right time for us to have children and add on to the Bame family? And what should I do in the mean time to to help quench my baby hunger?

(Please, if you read this and know my mother do not tell her I'm baby hungry. She can be very persistent if she wants a grandchild.)

6 comments:

Sarah said...

PS I'm 27, married with no children so you are not alone. I'm sorry you're baby hungry. I've heard it can be tough sometimes. We are in nursery so we get plenty of babies every Sunday! Go visit the nursery on Sunday and still if you are ready. If figure if I think they are cute enough to make me sad I don't have one even when they are crying and smelly etc, then it will be time to add a little McClean to the world. Does that help? :)

Jen said...

Ha, yeah, moms definitely get their minds set on grandkids.

All of my college friends have or are pregnant with their THIRD children. All. It's so crazy. I totally understand what you're saying.

Putting the ideas/urges/plannings in a notebook is a great idea. I think the moment you'll know it's time for kids is when you see a baby quilt, outfit, stroller, etc. and instead of thinking how fun that'd be for a "future" baby or someone else's baby, you'll think how nice that would be for your baby. Once you start imagining things for your own baby, you're screwed and may as well start trying. :)

The Bames said...

Maybe I will get lucky and be called into the Nursery in our new ward.(Wow, never thought I would say that.)

Jacob & Emily said...

I have these same thoughts. Except I'm not so worried about being pregnant it's having it come out. I also have this crazy fear that it's head will fall off. I know it won't, but for some freak reason I break down in tears when someone pawns their brand new baby off for me to hold. So, you may just "know". You may not. I'm not sure you'll ever be ready either. So, we'll sit in the same boat with you guys until one of us gets knocked up! Oh and the Nursery is the best way to solve baby hunger.

Nathan and Hailey Frogley said...

Hey Jeff and Amber this is Hailey adn Nathan Frogley! Cool we found your blog, tell Jeff we have one too and come check us out!

Melanie said...

Hey Amber! Thanks for the comment...now I can add you to my blog list. :)